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Beth Bruno - Hi Rii. I'm the moderator for tonight's chat.
Beth Bruno - We'll be talking about ways to discuss with children the terrorist attacks and their aftermath.
Beth Bruno - What is your position in the schools?
Beth Bruno - An excellent website for suggestions is http://aboutourkids.org, out of NYU Child Study Center.
Beth Bruno - How have you been helping students cope with their feelings about the events of 9/11?
Milli - I've been so impressed about what happened that I really don't know how to interact about the theme with my kids...
Beth Bruno - What grade do you teach?
Milli - Beth, should I keep on talking about the theme of war? They ask in every class...
Beth Bruno - What are some of the questions students are asking? When students are asking, they usually want information and reassurance.
Milli - I'm an 8th grade teacher
Milli - The questions students are asking is mainly we are all asking: Will there be a war, a world war? Will we be involved?
Beth Bruno - 8th graders are certainly old enough to engage in discussions of these subjects. History is being made every minute and can be the basis for incredible lessons.
Beth Bruno - I think an honest answer to the question about war is that we are already in the middle of a war, unlike any we've ever fought before.
Beth Bruno - Then go into some of the specifics - this for upper middle to high school students.
Beth Bruno - young children will want to know what a war is.
Beth Bruno - What subject do you teach, Milli?
Milli - I'm a Language Arts teacher
Beth Bruno - Have you asked students to write about their feelings and thoughts related to 9/11?
Beth Bruno - Here are some suggestions.
Milli - Oh, the very next day. And their responses are really spooky. I wonder what is in their minds?
Beth Bruno - Ask students to write down ten facts about what happened on 9/11 and the days since then.
Milli - How should I reassure them
Beth Bruno - Ask students to read from their lists and help them sort out fact from opinion from distortion of fact.
Beth Bruno - Give me an example of spooky responses.
Beth Bruno - The process of discussion and your openness to it is reassuring.
Beth Bruno - Knowledge of what we know and don't know is, too.
Milli - They're talking about atomic attacks, about the whole world around them being destroyed, about blood all over, and things like that...
Beth Bruno - It sounds like they're afraid. That's very understandable.
Milli - So, that's exactly what I would like help on. How do we keep these kids at peace?
Beth Bruno - Maybe you and the history teacher could team up to do some lessons.
Milli - Lessons like?
Beth Bruno - Lessons that address the source of their fears. Lessons based on what is likely to happen vs. what is happening.
Milli - So what about chemical and germ war they're hearing about all over the place?
Beth Bruno - Children need to know that in the majority of ways, our world is gradually returning to normal. We are all continuing on with our lives as we were before.
Milli - But, you know something, for some reason I don't understand, these young people are suddenly watching the news, and they hear about all these rumors...
Beth Bruno - Adults are concerned about these matters, too. There are specific measures that law enforcement agencies are taking to reduce the risk of chemical and germ warfare.
Beth Bruno - Much of what is reported on the news is factual. Kids are hearing the facts, too. Fears need the balance of reason.
Beth Bruno - I suggest this site because it has numerous suggestions about talking with students about these subjects.
Laura - I work with young children. When they are drawing pictures, their pictures show things that they see on the news. Terrorist attacks etc. Do I redirect them or talk to them about it?
Beth Bruno - Invite them to talk about their pictures, so you get an understanding about their thinking.
Milli - Beth, I really think you have already helped and given some ideas I'll try starting tomorrow. God Bless you, and God Bless America. bye...
Beth Bruno - Laura, young children need basic information, but then you can let the subject go until they ask again.
Beth Bruno - Even children as young as two need simple explanations and reassurance
Laura - Our principal wants us to discuss the theme of peace to help them. Any suggestions?
Beth Bruno - one misunderstanding, for example, is that some young children think that every time they see the building hit by a plane, it's a different building.
Beth Bruno - hey don't realize that it's a rerun of the same event played over and over.
Beth Bruno - This can frighten children, because they think there are planes hitting lots of buildings.
Laura - That's an interesting thought...it never occurred to me that they would think it's a different building...scary!
Kathleen - I showed the kids an object from Pakistan and immediately one child called out, did you hear about the planes that hit the building? "Pakistan" triggered the thought
Beth Bruno - When you explain the facts to them, they usually calm right down and return to their play or their lessons.
Beth Bruno - Map reading helps, too. Show the children where the different places are. Help them understand long distances and how rare such an event is!
Laura - Unfortunately I live in Boston...and NYC is very near!"
Beth Bruno - Help them understand, too, that the world isn't full of zillions of people who act like this - compared to the general population, it is very few.
Beth Bruno - But a small number of people can sometimes make huge trouble.
Beth Bruno - Near for a 5 year old is sitting next to him or her. They need to know that their immediate world is secure.
Beth Bruno - Imagine how tough it must be for teachers and parents to reassure children who witnessed some of the events of 9/11!
Laura - Thank you for pointing that out...I need to be reminded of how children view their world.
Beth Bruno - I cry for the children who lost a parent or brother or sister. Such a shock to their security and peace.
Beth Bruno - What kind of help are the adults in your schools getting? and from whom?
Laura - That's an excellent question. We are not getting any help right now. We are finding all sorts of help online for children...how to talk to them about the tragedy etc.
Beth Bruno - We need help, too. Our reassurances might come across as hollow when we fear some of the awful possibilities being bandied about.
Kathleen - I showed the kids an object from Pakistan and immediately one child called out, did you hear about the planes that hit the building? "Pakistan" triggered the thought
Laura - I agree...I think that my own insecurities with the situation are hard to mask...so I may avoid discussing them.
Beth Bruno - Me too. I think the terrorists will strike again, in some other unimaginable way. That's the scary side of it for me.
Beth Bruno - I reassure myself that our government and authorities are doing everything they can to make it hard for terrorists to operate.
Laura - What are some ways for adults to cope with this? This is new territory...something that has been "over there" for so long, but now it's not that far away.
Beth Bruno - I also trust that 99.9 percent of people value human life and want to live to old age - even people who are being brainwashed to think otherwise.
Beth Bruno - I have friends who talk about what it is like to live in Israel. They learn many practical ways of dealing with the possibilities of terrorism in their back yards.
Laura - I' m not sure of the percentage, but it is reassuring to know that people I live with every day have the same common values.
Beth Bruno - hope it never gets that bad for us in this country.
Kathleen - I think try to remember that things aren't really that different other than our knowledge of danger that has actually existed for some time,
Kathleen - there has been no help offered for adults in our district
Kathleen - Maybe the lack of participation tonight is an indication that people don't even want to think or talk about it
Beth Bruno - Maybe each of you could suggest that a teachers meeting be devoted to talking about teacher's feelings about all this. It could be so helpful!
Kathleen - I think it would be helpful for more adults to talk about it, away from children
Beth Bruno - Perhaps the school psychologist could moderate the discussion or a consultant to the district that the administration brings in.
Laura - I know that in our school, we have tried to believe that everything is "back to normal." Your suggestion about a teacher's meeting may be helpful...I know that it is hard for us to face our own fears.
Beth Bruno - These are very scary times for us, as adults. Look at what has happened to the economy, just in the last two weeks.
Kathleen - Many adults don't want to reveal, or say aloud, what their fears are related to terrorism, saying it will make it real
Laura - As I mentioned earlier, perhaps one way we are coping is promoting peace.
Beth Bruno - I think the kids are helping us cope. They're so much quicker to get back to just being kids. We want to join them, don't you think?
Kathleen - I'm gathering materials to familiarize my students with people from Afghanistan and Pakistan to humanize them, antidote to the negative.
Laura - I agree 100%. In the midst of the scariest day of my life, the kids were not aware of what was going on, and they were the best therapy for getting through the day.
Kathleen - It was scary when I was a kid, nuclear threat
Beth Bruno - I met a man in the library today who was looking for a copy of the Koran. Sadly, his motives were to find all the messages of hate for women in their preachings.
Laura - I recall the days when we went home from school early to practice for a nuclear threat...and the information about fallout shelters...now that you mentioned it.
Beth Bruno - Before he even saw it, he had decided what he would find.
Beth Bruno - 've never read the Koran. Have you?
Kathleen - That's sad and worrisome
Kathleen - I have not read it.
Beth Bruno - I can't believe that messages of hate against women would be tenets of any religion.
Kathleen - I doubt there are messages of hate in the Koran, perhaps outdated views of role of women, as in bible
Beth Bruno - Possibly I can find a copy of the Koran online. I'm curious now about what it says about women.
Laura - I've never read the Koran. Now I am curious to read some of the text to become familiar with it.
Beth Bruno - Certainly the group called the Taliban has taken women's rights back into the dark ages!
Kathleen - The muslims I know are wonderful families
Kathleen - Judging Islam or Afghanistan by the Taliban would like judging us by the KKK
Beth Bruno - I continue to believe that the majority of people of Islam are just like me underneath the skin - wanting to live a life of kindness, love, fun and personal expression of their talents.
Beth Bruno - Wanting the same things for their children that I want for mine. The talk of war is so upsetting, because children get thrown into it!
Kathleen - I agree Beth
Beth Bruno - Yes, I guess it's time to sign off. Sorry about the technical problems. I think that kept many people away.
Laura - Thank you for your suggestions Beth. I will look at the web site that you posted earlier in the conversation.
Beth Bruno - Nice meeting you, Laura. Peace to all of you.
Kathleen - Thanks, Beth.
Kathleen - Laura, thanks for joining the chat tonight.
Laura - Thank you...Good night
Beth Bruno - good night.
Kathleen - Peace back at you, goodnight
