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Method & Theory

    Re: four year old who is uncooperative
    WOW

    WOW! If you follow this advice you might want to warn the Kinder
    teacher that the child will need counseling by the time he gets to
    her.

    The other posters had better advice. jmo

    On 3/28/11, Sara wrote:

    > With some kids even kids this young I've asked, "Does this
    > work for you, John? Is it working for you? Does this make you
    > happy John?" (long pause and usually John or Susie or
    > whatever looks pretty surprised to be asked such questions)
    >
    > And then go on - "because it doesn't look like it's working
    > for you to me. I've been teaching for a very long time and
    > I've rarely seen a child that seems as unhappy as you are.
    > I'm sorry to say it and ever sorrier to see it but you look
    > like one of the unhappiest children I've ever seen.
    >
    > (still stunned to shock look on Johnny's face)
    >
    > It can't possibly be working for you. Almost none of the
    > other students in our class like you. I like you but I cannot
    > like what you're doing to yourself. You're making yourself
    > miserable - you like to say it's what others have done that
    > upsets you but what you do to yourself is what's really
    > upsetting you. EVERYBODY HAS BIRTHDAYS and it can't be your
    > birthday every day. Don't be silly - that's ridiculous. To
    > run away and get mad because it's someone's birthday is
    > ridiculous. There are 365 days in the year and you can't have
    > been born on every one of them.
    >
    > Now - this is silly nonsense and I have no more patience for
    > it. If you want to get mad and run away, please run into that
    > corner over there and stay there. The other children and I
    > will be having fun over here."
    >
    > Sometimes you have to lay out the harsh truth.