Also, look at your school policies regarding cheating (you
probably do know them already). If they are such that cheating,
even one time, is an unrecoverable offense that will remain
forever never to be made up for, you can bet the parents will
defend their child to the death. Many schools policies on
cheating are so stiff that it is better to take the chance that
you might get out of the punishment than to admit your poor
choice. These poor choices are made for a variety of reasons,
the last of which is to purposfully make a teacher angry.
Typically it is to hide a deficiency or because it was a rash
choice to make up for another poor choice.

On 11/02/09, good luck wrote:
>
>>
>> any tips on how to say this in a way that gets parents to
>> support you?
>
> First, I'd say let's recognize to ourselves and to them as
> well that if a student cheats, it at least means they still
> want to do well in school. I have students who wouldn't
> bother to cheat - they don't care enough to cheat.
>
> So there's good news - the cheater cares about his grades -
> and enough to take a bit of a risk.
>
> Next - is this a kid who always cheats, sometimes cheats or
> never cheated before to your knowledge? That makes a HUGE
> difference and to not acknowledge that is a mistake for the
> kid as well as for getting along with the parents.
>
> Most of the time we lump all cheaters together - no one likes
> to have themselves or their child lumped in with habitual
> criminals.... even the judge in court takes note of whether
> we're a 'one time offender'.
>
> And then - what do you want to accomplish? What's your top
> priority? You want the parents to be on your side? You wnat
> them to throw the kid from a ledge as a gesture of support?
> You want them to let you throw the kid from a ledge?
>
> I understand that you want their support but for what
> exactly? Whatever it is, start by saying that Tommy did......
> but a. he does this all the time b. he's never done this
> before c. only does this when something is up - what might
> that be, Mrs. Smith?
>
> Why he cheated is important and rarely do we talk about that
> again upsetting parents. Our discussions need to be results -
> based - what result do we want to achieve with the kid? If
> he's one time cheater, something got away from it. If he's a
> habitual cheater, he should be tested - there's something
> going on with him.
>
> Don't create more problems - make it clear to the parents
> that you want to solve this problem as it is something that
> will land in very hot water down the road so let's, Mrs.
> Smith, figure out why this happened and what we can do to
> help Tommy understand why it shouldn't happen again.
>
> Saying that works. Don't play the blame game, fix the
> problem, don't try to fix the blame because that accomplishes
> nothing but to waste your time and theirs.
> Good luck.
>
>

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