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| Teachers.Net Gazette Vol.5 No.12 |
December 2008 |
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The Teachers.Net Gazette is a collaborative project
published by the Teachers.Net community |
Editor in Chief: Kathleen Alape Carpenter
Layout Editor: Mary Miehl

Cover Story by Bill Page

Effective Teaching by Harry & Rosemary Wong

Contributors this month: Sue Gruber, Kioni Carter, Marvin Marshall, , Marjan Glavac, Todd R. Nelson, Hal Portner, Leah Davies, Barbara Pressman, Tim Newlin, Bill Page, James Wayne, Hank Kellner, Magoo, Bruce J. Gevirtzman, Barb Stutesman, Ron Victoria, Tony Wagner, Alan Haskvitz,Mrs. Mimi, and YENDOR.

Submissions: click for Submission Guidelines

Advertising: contact Bob Reap
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Classroom Humor...

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Archive
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Discussion


The Lighter Side of Teaching

Humor from the Teachers.Net Community
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Teachers.Net Community
Regular Feature in the Gazette
December 1, 2008 |
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Karaoke with YENDOR!
To sing along with YENDOR, click here!
Well, this is not your TOP TEN...
but thought I would do something a little bit different this month.
To the tune of The Cover of the Rolling Stone
Well I'm a big shot teacher, not a doctor or a preacher
And I've been teaching 65 years
I teach about history and I teach about math
But I'm not allowed to paddle their rears
I take all kinds of pills to stay happy all year
But there's one thrill I haven't had yet
It's the thrill that'll get you when you get your picture
On the cover of the Teacher's Gazette
(Refrain)
Teacher's Gazetteeeeeeeeeeeeee
Wanna see my picture on the cover
Zette............
Want to send five copies to my mother
Zette............
Want to see my smiling face
On the cover of the Teacher's Gazette
I've got a worn out Chevy and my belly's getting heavy
And I'm still teaching history all day
I'm on fifteen committees and my boss is a ditty
And I'm doing extra work for no pay
The kids won't listen to the things that I mention
But I'm not giving up just yet
Cause I can't quit trying till I see me smiling
On the cover of the Teacher's Gazette
(Refrain)
Well, I've written Bob Reap and from him not a peep
And I've begged in the teacher's chatroom
I've sent money to Kat and was told not to get
My high hopes up too soon
So I'll just keep teaching and quit all the preaching
And pray that it might happen yet
Cause I won't be happy till I'm looking real snappy
On the cover of the Teacher's Gazette
The midi sequence is from Bob Barnes' site


Paternity Issue
Posted by Battleship Ron
on the Teacher Chatboard
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He’s rather taken back because he can’t place where he knows her from.
So he says, “Do you know me?” To which she replies, “I think you’re the father of one of my kids.” Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and asks, “Are you the stripper from the bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery???”
She looks into his eyes and says calmly, “No ........ I’m your son’s teacher.”



» More Gazette articles...



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About YENDOR...

Hi there! My name is YENDOR and I live in Alabama, the land of good Looking women and high humidity.
I was a traveling piano picker for about 25 years, a radio jock and then backed into teaching. I taught sixth grade one year and then fifth gradefor twenty-seven years.
My hobbies are computer, collecting old radio shows from the 30's-50's, classic OLD TV shows, Asian horror movies, reading, collecting autographs, and music. My favorite singer/songwriter is Michelle Shocked. If you don't like her you don't like me. My favorite comedian is W.C. Fields. My favorite author is Mark Twain.
I play the piano, bass guitar and drums. I sometimes wish I had done that for a living.
I have a freakish sense of humor and rarely agree with anyone on anything. I love practical jokes and only play them on people I like... which is a short list.
I retired from teaching two years ago and don't miss it a bit. People come up to me all the time and say, "What do you DO all day?" I simply tell them that I retire.
If you are ever in northern Alabama, come by and see me. If you don't drink sweet tea you will be shot at the door. If you put a lemon in it you will be beaten but not shot... the first time.
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YENDOR Top 10 Lists on Teachers.Net...
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Related Resources & Discussions on Teachers.Net...

Latest Posts on the Teachers.Net Classroom Humor Chatboard...
- Re: Retirement Dinner Program, 11/17/09, by Stephanie Smith.
- Top 10 Ways NOT to Answer the School Phone!, 11/07/09, by YENDOR strikes again!.
- Re: words of wisdom????, 10/11/09, by Jessa Sy.
- Re: Educational cartoons for a presentation..FREE, 10/09/09, by Carol.
- Re: thanksgiving skit/play needed, 10/07/09, by Debbie Porter.
- Re: teacher retirement skit, 10/06/09, by TC.
- Re: Top Ten All Time TV Shows for Teachers by YENDOR (rated , 10/01/09, by Bo.
- Funny Kindy story, 9/28/09, by kindytchr.
- Re: How to make a board, 9/23/09, by Dwayne Surdu-Miller.
- Cash for Flunkers... Leno, 9/16/09, by Cash for Flunkers... Leno.
- Re: Top Ten All Time TV Shows for Teachers by YENDOR (rated , 9/13/09, by Teachers.Net.
- “Gentlemen, hold onto your balls!” From real classrooms, 9/11/09, by Teachers.Net.
- Re: funny school answering machine message, 9/10/09, by Kate.
- Funny and functional Today is ... calendar is posted, 9/04/09, by Teachers.Net.
- FUNNY SKITS FOR TEACHERS CHRISTMAS PROGRAM, 9/03/09, by CORI.
- Top Ten list for teachers - the latest YENDOR gems, 9/01/09, by Teachers.Net.
- Re: mouths, mouths, I meant mouths, 8/30/09, by judy5ca nfm.
- Out of the mouthes..., 8/30/09, by judy5ca.
- Re: teacher skits for back to school, 8/29/09, by JAKE.
- skit for teacher's day with teachers inside th skit, 8/15/09, by audrey.
- Re: teacher skits for back to school, 8/13/09, by Mary Kay.
- Re: words of wisdom????, 8/08/09, by John.
- Amigo The Potcake , 7/30/09, by Noah DC.
- Re: Kid quips collected by Teachers.Net teachers , 7/27/09, by EllenG59.
- Top 10 Fictional Teachers of All Time!, 7/14/09, by Blair Gardner.
- Re: Retirement Dinner Program, 7/09/09, by Bev .
- Fact: We salesmen believe we can sell anything, 6/24/09, by Dale.
- Re: humorous poetry about teaching, 6/23/09, by Terry Stelle.
- teacher skits for back to school, 6/14/09, by Jamie.
- Re: I'm retiring, 5/21/09, by Bill.
- I'm retiring, 5/17/09, by Anne.
- funny song about school counselor, 5/14/09, by Cindy.
- Kid quips collected by Teachers.Net teachers , 4/29/09, by Kathleen.
- Re: Point to Ponder, 4/19/09, by me.
- Apology to field trip supervisor, 4/18/09, by Kim.
Discussion
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