Students Who Bully

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Students Who Bully

by JAR

Mar 17, 2011

Does anyone have any good ideas for working with students who bully? We have had several incidents reported among middle school students this week. The principal is dealing with it from a discipline point of view, but I would like to do some type of counseling also. Yesterday we had a student call another students "a stupid Nazi" because of his German heritage. The student got two days of in-school suspension, but I also suggested that she write a report on the contributions Germans have made to the world. Does anyone have suggestions of what you do at your school? Are there commercial programs out there that address this?

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Sara On 3/17/11, JAR wrote: > Does anyone have any good ideas for working with students > who bully? We have had several incidents reported among > middle school students this week. The principal is dealing > with it from a discipline point of view, but I would like > to do some type of counseling also. Yesterday we had a > student cal...See MoreOn 3/17/11, JAR wrote: > Does anyone have any good ideas for working with students > who bully? We have had several incidents reported among > middle school students this week. The principal is dealing > with it from a discipline point of view, but I would like > to do some type of counseling also. Yesterday we had a > student call another students "a stupid Nazi" because of > his German heritage. The student got two days of in-school > suspension, but I also suggested that she write a report on > the contributions Germans have made to the world. Does > anyone have suggestions of what you do at your school? Are > there commercial programs out there that address this?

I'm not sure that commercial programs work all that well - they're rather generic. I'd agree too that two days of in- school suspension does little but I'd say the same of having students write reports. Both of these assume that you can punish someone out of name-calling - but is that what you're willing to settle for?

Kids blurt things out - it's good for them to learn to control what they say when they blurt because blurting 'stupid Nazi' in the workplace will get them fired. But what about the student of German heritage? What happened between these kids? Can we counsel instead of punishing?

Kids do blurt and we can't turn on the impulse control in adolescents like it's a switch to be thrown - if only we could. But we can look at these incidents as opportunities to counsel. Some kids will tell me - "I didn't mean it." Then apologize - did you have the name caller apologize? Did you see sincerity? Can we help to build a bridge?

I don't know that you need a commercial program - how do you resolve conflicts with your neighbors? Friends? Share your own experiences.

We live in tension-filled times that can bring out less than our best. Bullying happens when there's too little good that's felt and kids don't feel a sense of community in the school. Is yours a large school? Large schools have almost no chance to build any real sense of community. Kids know inside themselves that if we really wanted schools to be communities, we wouldn't have made them as large as we did.

And what about your faculty? I'd like to say that mine is bully-free but we've got a bully or even two or three on the faculty who bully students - that only models bullying for them and communicates the message that bullying is ok - even teachers do it.

What kind of tone does your principal set for the school? Who's there in the morning to greet students as they enter the school? Bullying is born of insecurity - how can you help your school's students to be more secure?

Mar 18, 2011

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Leah For an article that you may find helpful, click below for a direct link

Mar 19, 2011

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Matthew Kuehlhorn On 3/17/11, JAR wrote: > Does anyone have any good ideas for working with students > who bully? We have had several incidents reported among > middle school students this week. The principal is dealing > with it from a discipline point of view, but I would like > to do some type of counseling also. Yesterday we had a > student ca...See More

Apr 6, 2011

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