kid loves learning, hates school

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kid loves learning, hates school

by gifted mom

Oct 14, 2010

I am an elementary school regular ed teacher with a gifted daughter. Usually I post on my grade level board, but I thought maybe the experts on this board would have some ideas.

My daughter is a first grader, and she is in the gifted program. For the first nine weeks of school her math homework involved things like, "Fill in the blank 1 ___ 3 4 5 ___" and "Tell your parents how you use a number chart." When I met with the math teacher to ask her about this (these are things she has been able to do for years), the teacher gave her the end of the year test by closing her in an office where she thought she was being punished and letting her cry for 40 minutes. Then the teacher showed me the "test" to prove that my child doesn't really need a challenge (which she actually did quite well on). When I asked why the skills on the test are not being taught in class, I was told that the first nine weeks is "review, to build the kids' confidence." My kid doesn't need multiple repetition...See MoreI am an elementary school regular ed teacher with a gifted daughter. Usually I post on my grade level board, but I thought maybe the experts on this board would have some ideas.

My daughter is a first grader, and she is in the gifted program. For the first nine weeks of school her math homework involved things like, "Fill in the blank 1 ___ 3 4 5 ___" and "Tell your parents how you use a number chart." When I met with the math teacher to ask her about this (these are things she has been able to do for years), the teacher gave her the end of the year test by closing her in an office where she thought she was being punished and letting her cry for 40 minutes. Then the teacher showed me the "test" to prove that my child doesn't really need a challenge (which she actually did quite well on). When I asked why the skills on the test are not being taught in class, I was told that the first nine weeks is "review, to build the kids' confidence." My kid doesn't need multiple repetitions or nine weeks of review, she picks things up much more quickly than that.

My daughter's reading teacher has a concern that she is not paying attention, she seems tired and puts her head down on her desk during reading. So much so that on her report card she was downgraded in the work ethic section (this is extremely unlike her, she has always been well behaved, hard working, and a pleaser). The teacher says she understands the concepts thoroughly, is able to complete high quality work and demonstrate higher level thinking skills consistently, but she doesn't pay attention to the instruction, so maybe she should be put in a lower level reading group. I see it this way: the child can do everything you ask and more without the benefit of any of your instruction....she's bored.

My daughter loves learning. She looks things up on the internet, she reads constantly, she runs her own little science experiments at home and does math for fun (fractions, fact families, addition with regrouping, etc.). Until this year she loved school (preschool, kinder), but now she cries and says she doesn't want to go, the reading teacher says she seems depressed, and other subject area teachers have said she has crying meltdowns in their classes.

I understand that my daughter has different needs. I do what I can to help her at home...she is in after school activities to gain better social skills, and we give her more challenging work at home so that she can continue to progress. When we see her self-directing her learning, we encourage her in whatever activity it is she's trying, whether it's observing the bugs outside or asking for math problems. I am a teacher, I know how hard it is to meet every kid at their level all the time. But I feel like she's not even being met half way.

I'm new to this as a mom...what do you suggest? Should I offer to provide alternate activities and ask the teachers to allow her to do that during class time instead? I hate to make her stick out or to make her think she doesn't have to listen to the teacher. But I also hate to see her time wasted and to see her love of school dying. What is appropriate to ask for from the teachers? What is appropriate to expect from the school?

Thanks for any thoughts or advice.

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Oldtimer On 10/14/10, gifted mom wrote: > I am an elementary school regular ed teacher with a gifted > daughter. Usually I post on my grade level board, but I > thought maybe the experts on this board would have some > ideas. > > My daughter is a first grader, and she is in the gifted > program. For the first nine weeks of school her ma...See MoreOn 10/14/10, gifted mom wrote: > I am an elementary school regular ed teacher with a gifted > daughter. Usually I post on my grade level board, but I > thought maybe the experts on this board would have some > ideas. > > My daughter is a first grader, and she is in the gifted > program. For the first nine weeks of school her math > homework involved things like, "Fill in the blank 1 ___ 3 4 > 5 ___" and "Tell your parents how you use a number chart." > When I met with the math teacher to ask her about this > (these are things she has been able to do for years), the > teacher gave her the end of the year test by closing her in > an office where she thought she was being punished and > letting her cry for 40 minutes. Then the teacher showed me > the "test" to prove that my child doesn't really need a > challenge (which she actually did quite well on). When I > asked why the skills on the test are not being taught in > class, I was told that the first nine weeks is "review, to > build the kids' confidence." My kid doesn't need multiple > repetitions or nine weeks of review, she picks things up > much more quickly than that. > > My daughter's reading teacher has a concern that she is not > paying attention, she seems tired and puts her head down on > her desk during reading. So much so that on her report card > she was downgraded in the work ethic section (this is > extremely unlike her, she has always been well behaved, > hard working, and a pleaser). The teacher says she > understands the concepts thoroughly, is able to complete > high quality work and demonstrate higher level thinking > skills consistently, but she doesn't pay attention to the > instruction, so maybe she should be put in a lower level > reading group. I see it this way: the child can do > everything you ask and more without the benefit of any of > your instruction....she's bored. > > My daughter loves learning. She looks things up on the > internet, she reads constantly, she runs her own little > science experiments at home and does math for fun > (fractions, fact families, addition with regrouping, etc.). > Until this year she loved school (preschool, kinder), but > now she cries and says she doesn't want to go, the reading > teacher says she seems depressed, and other subject area > teachers have said she has crying meltdowns in their > classes. > > I understand that my daughter has different needs. I do > what I can to help her at home...she is in after school > activities to gain better social skills, and we give her > more challenging work at home so that she can continue to > progress. When we see her self-directing her learning, we > encourage her in whatever activity it is she's trying, > whether it's observing the bugs outside or asking for math > problems. I am a teacher, I know how hard it is to meet > every kid at their level all the time. But I feel like > she's not even being met half way. > > I'm new to this as a mom...what do you suggest? Should I > offer to provide alternate activities and ask the teachers > to allow her to do that during class time instead? I hate > to make her stick out or to make her think she doesn't have > to listen to the teacher. But I also hate to see her time > wasted and to see her love of school dying. What is > appropriate to ask for from the teachers? What is > appropriate to expect from the school? > > Thanks for any thoughts or advice.

If I may make a suggestion ?? You are just starting the journey with your child in grade one. There is plenty of time to get a good working plan in place now for your daughter which will follow her from yr to yr.

Although it may take some time and work in the beginning to get it up and going an IEP would be a good route to go.

[link removed]

By a good ''working'' IEP I would mean the document should not just be put in place but referred to often and not stowed away somewhere and glanced at from time to time.

Your child does not have to feel she is punished by being isolated for testing. To put her in a lower level reading group may very well prove disastrous for her. These issues could be written into your dd's IEP. Just an example of how these legal documents work.

All the very best to you and your child!

Nov 14, 2010

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lbp br> > If I may make a suggestion ?? You are just starting the > journey with your child in grade one. There is plenty of time > to get a good working plan in place now for your daughter > which will follow her from yr to yr. > > Although it may take some time and work in the beginning > to get it up and going an IEP would be...See More

Nov 17, 2010

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First of all, she needs more sleep at night 10 hours minimum for a gifted first grader. Get her to bed earlier. See how that works.

If she still cries and hates school, consider a home-school situation, an independent study program, letting her forget about school until she's 7 and then trying it again, or find another option that won't have her dropping out at 15 and wandering the ...See More10 hours minimum for a gifted first grader. Get her to bed earlier. See how that works.

If she still cries and hates school, consider a home-school situation, an independent study program, letting her forget about school until she's 7 and then trying it again, or find another option that won't have her dropping out at 15 and wandering the streets with her troublemaking, genius, nihilistic goth buddies.

Or, OK, get a head start and buy her a bass guitar. All the goth boys will look out for her, because she'll be the one bass player running with a dozen lead guitarists.

On 10/14/10, gifted mom wrote: > I am an elementary school regular ed teacher with a gifted > daughter. Usually I post on my grade level board, but I > thought maybe the experts on this board would have some > ideas. > > My daughter is a first grader, and she is in the gifted > program. For the first nine weeks of school her math > homework involved things like, "Fill in the blank 1 ___ 3 4 > 5 ___" and "Tell your parents how you use a number chart." > When I met with the math teacher to ask her about this > (these are things she has been able to do for years), the > teacher gave her the end of the year test by closing her in > an office where she thought she was being punished and > letting her cry for 40 minutes. Then the teacher showed me > the "test" to prove that my child doesn't really need a > challenge (which she actually did quite well on). When I > asked why the skills on the test are not being taught in > class, I was told that the first nine weeks is "review, to > build the kids' confidence." My kid doesn't need multiple > repetitions or nine weeks of review, she picks things up > much more quickly than that. > > My daughter's reading teacher has a concern that she is not > paying attention, she seems tired and puts her head down on > her desk during reading. So much so that on her report card > she was downgraded in the work ethic section (this is > extremely unlike her, she has always been well behaved, > hard working, and a pleaser). The teacher says she > understands the concepts thoroughly, is able to complete > high quality work and demonstrate higher level thinking > skills consistently, but she doesn't pay attention to the > instruction, so maybe she should be put in a lower level > reading group. I see it this way: the child can do > everything you ask and more without the benefit of any of > your instruction....she's bored. > > My daughter loves learning. She looks things up on the > internet, she reads constantly, she runs her own little > science experiments at home and does math for fun > (fractions, fact families, addition with regrouping, etc.). > Until this year she loved school (preschool, kinder), but > now she cries and says she doesn't want to go, the reading > teacher says she seems depressed, and other subject area > teachers have said she has crying meltdowns in their > classes. > > I understand that my daughter has different needs. I do > what I can to help her at home...she is in after school > activities to gain better social skills, and we give her > more challenging work at home so that she can continue to > progress. When we see her self-directing her learning, we > encourage her in whatever activity it is she's trying, > whether it's observing the bugs outside or asking for math > problems. I am a teacher, I know how hard it is to meet > every kid at their level all the time. But I feel like > she's not even being met half way. > > I'm new to this as a mom...what do you suggest? Should I > offer to provide alternate activities and ask the teachers > to allow her to do that during class time instead? I hate > to make her stick out or to make her think she doesn't have > to listen to the teacher. But I also hate to see her time > wasted and to see her love of school dying. What is > appropriate to ask for from the teachers? What is > appropriate to expect from the school? > > Thanks for any thoughts or advice.

Nov 17, 2010

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Oldtimer On 11/17/10, lbp wrote: >> >> If I may make a suggestion ?? You are just starting the >> journey with your child in grade one. There is plenty of time >> to get a good working plan in place now for your daughter >> which will follow her from yr to yr. >> >> Although it may take some time and work in the beg...See More

Nov 18, 2010

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2 gifted kids The book Genius Denied has some great information. Also hoggies gifted and the Davidson inst. have sections geared toward parents that you might find helpful.

Have you considered full grade acceleration

Dec 9, 2010

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