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First Grade Teachers Chatboard

First grade crush?

by Sue

Feb 28, 2012

Hello. I have a first grade son who has a crush on a first grade girl in his class. He seems a bit obessed...says she's beautiful, wonder why she doesn't like him, talks about her almost daily, cut a picture of her out of a school newsletter and put it in his wallet that he keeps at home. She's a daily thought in his mind. The teachers said the girl doesn't mind the attention, in fact she eggs it on, but is it strange for a first grade boy to have such an intense "crush"?

I can take any comments...just want to get to the bottom of this. Makes me uncomfortable but not sure what to do!

MItzi I think by allowing it to continue, everyone is encouraging it. If he asks you why she doesn't like him, I would answer (witha humorous tone) "Dear son! You know you asked me that yesterday! (or five minutes ago) What was my answer?" Or if he says she is beautiful I would answer. "Dear son! WHat did I tell you about that?" Hopefully he would say "I...See More

Feb 29, 2012

AM If she doesn't mind, he isn't bugging her and it isn't affecting his school work I wouldn't worry about it. Chances are something will change it before it's a problem.

My son had the same thing with a girl in Kinder-First then she got with a little clique of girls and him liking her wasn't so cool anymore so she ignored him. It hurt his f...See More

Mar 26, 2012

maureen When I was in first grade in the late 50's there was another first grade boy who was trying to kiss me on the playground (asphalt). I had absolutely no desire to be kissed and I ran as fast as I could to avoid his kiss. I fell flat on my face, knocked out four teeth, swallowed three, and had bloody hands and knees. But I didn't cry. I "Won" that ba...See MoreWhen I was in first grade in the late 50's there was another first grade boy who was trying to kiss me on the playground (asphalt). I had absolutely no desire to be kissed and I ran as fast as I could to avoid his kiss. I fell flat on my face, knocked out four teeth, swallowed three, and had bloody hands and knees. But I didn't cry. I "Won" that battle. I ran into this same boy over 40 years later at the mall store I worked at and when I saw his name on his charge card, I asked if he was from my home town. He said no but lived close by and when I asked I said, oh, yes it was close. He asked me if I was from that home town, and I said yes. Finally I said. "Well, the reason I asked, was that there was a boy in my class with the same name. He hesitated and then said "Was it at (name of school) and the teacher was (name of teacher)?" I responded with a yes. He of course, said that was him. His teenaged daughter with him was really starting to laugh at this conversation. What was interesting was that that was the only year he attended that school due to distance he had to travel by bus. I told him why I remembered him (the chase and falling) and even noted the scar on my hand from that fall. By then his dd was roaring with laughter (probably saying wait til I tell Mom this one).

This was meant to happen - this meeting. He had never been in the city where I worked part time on weekends. He and his dd happened to stop off the interstate on their way home,she saw the mall sign, they came into the store I was working, and bought something at the register I just so happened to be working at way back in the store.

I being the object of his affection remembered clearly that day. He being the pursuer did not remember one second of that day. So, from my experience, in the scheme of life, this too will pass.

Now, my second grade granddaughter has had several young men vying for her undying love and she handles it pretty well. One little man puts a love note in her cubby still this school year. He has no other friends and he has his challenges in school. When she first brought this up about the notes, I told her that she was a beautiful girl and she was probably always going to have boys liking her. However, I told her she probably would not feel the same way the boy did. She would need to learn how to be kind yet not encourage as they have feelings too. She is not into the boyfriend/girlfriend thing at all. I also have told her that having boyfriends and being in love is teenager stuff and it isn't appropriate at her age. She really doesn't get bothered by the attention at all. Her girlfriends are her top priority at this age.

Mar 27, 2012

Leah I loved your post Maureen. So, interesting!

I also agree that this is not a big problem at this age. On 3/27/12, maureen wrote: > When I was in first grade in the late 50's there was another > first grade boy who was trying to kiss me on the playground > (asphalt). I had absolutely no desire to be kissed and I ran > as fast as...See MoreI loved your post Maureen. So, interesting!

I also agree that this is not a big problem at this age. On 3/27/12, maureen wrote: > When I was in first grade in the late 50's there was another > first grade boy who was trying to kiss me on the playground > (asphalt). I had absolutely no desire to be kissed and I ran > as fast as I could to avoid his kiss. I fell flat on my face, > knocked out four teeth, swallowed three, and had bloody hands > and knees. But I didn't cry. I "Won" that battle. I ran into > this same boy over 40 years later at the mall store I worked > at and when I saw his name on his charge card, I asked if he > was from my home town. He said no but lived close by and when > I asked I said, oh, yes it was close. He asked me if I was > from that home town, and I said yes. Finally I said. "Well, > the reason I asked, was that there was a boy in my class with > the same name. He hesitated and then said "Was it at (name of > school) and the teacher was (name of teacher)?" I responded > with a yes. He of course, said that was him. His teenaged > daughter with him was really starting to laugh at this > conversation. What was interesting was that that was the only > year he attended that school due to distance he had to travel > by bus. I told him why I remembered him (the chase and > falling) and even noted the scar on my hand from that fall. By > then his dd was roaring with laughter (probably saying wait > til I tell Mom this one). > > This was meant to happen - this meeting. He had never been in > the city where I worked part time on weekends. He and his dd > happened to stop off the interstate on their way home,she saw > the mall sign, they came into the store I was working, and > bought something at the register I just so happened to be > working at way back in the store. > > I being the object of his affection remembered clearly that > day. He being the pursuer did not remember one second of that > day. So, from my experience, in the scheme of life, this too > will pass. > > Now, my second grade granddaughter has had several young men > vying for her undying love and she handles it pretty well. One > little man puts a love note in her cubby still this school > year. He has no other friends and he has his challenges in > school. When she first brought this up about the notes, I told > her that she was a beautiful girl and she was probably always > going to have boys liking her. However, I told her she > probably would not feel the same way the boy did. She would > need to learn how to be kind yet not encourage as they have > feelings too. She is not into the boyfriend/girlfriend thing > at all. I also have told her that having boyfriends and being > in love is teenager stuff and it isn't appropriate at her age. > She really doesn't get bothered by the attention at all. Her > girlfriends are her top priority at this age.

Apr 3, 2012

Deb I agree with Maureen, this is a phase will two pass. When I was in Second Grade I had a crush on a classmate also. He used to sing and dance for me which I found funny. Hence, he was my first crush. I used to feel shy talking about him at home. My family used to tease me about my crush until I accepted it myself. I eventually got over that crush. A...See MoreI agree with Maureen, this is a phase will two pass. When I was in Second Grade I had a crush on a classmate also. He used to sing and dance for me which I found funny. Hence, he was my first crush. I used to feel shy talking about him at home. My family used to tease me about my crush until I accepted it myself. I eventually got over that crush. As life usually does, this classmate moved away. It took years, but in high school this individual looked me up to see how I was doing, and later on lost touch. Later on through college, this person found me on a social networking account and wanted to know what I was up to. To make a long story short.... I believe that this event will be both memorable to him and her. He will always remember her to be his first crush and she will always remember the attention she got. I would continue talking with him and telling him, that it's okay for her not to like him. I would explain that someday when he gets older the same thing might be the case for him. I would just tell him to talk to everyone and make friends with everyone because, I'm sure that the other kids are just as beautiful or just as fun as she is. If he only talks to her, than he will miss out on a wonderful opportunity to make new friends. Good Luck!

and On 3/27/12, maureen wrote: > When I was in first grade in the late 50's there was another > first grade boy who was trying to kiss me on the playground > (asphalt). I had absolutely no desire to be kissed and I ran > as fast as I could to avoid his kiss. I fell flat on my face, > knocked out four teeth, swallowed three, and had bloody hands > and knees. But I didn't cry. I "Won" that battle. I ran into > this same boy over 40 years later at the mall store I worked > at and when I saw his name on his charge card, I asked if he > was from my home town. He said no but lived close by and when > I asked I said, oh, yes it was close. He asked me if I was > from that home town, and I said yes. Finally I said. "Well, > the reason I asked, was that there was a boy in my class with > the same name. He hesitated and then said "Was it at (name of > school) and the teacher was (name of teacher)?" I responded > with a yes. He of course, said that was him. His teenaged > daughter with him was really starting to laugh at this > conversation. What was interesting was that that was the only > year he attended that school due to distance he had to travel > by bus. I told him why I remembered him (the chase and > falling) and even noted the scar on my hand from that fall. By > then his dd was roaring with laughter (probably saying wait > til I tell Mom this one). > > This was meant to happen - this meeting. He had never been in > the city where I worked part time on weekends. He and his dd > happened to stop off the interstate on their way home,she saw > the mall sign, they came into the store I was working, and > bought something at the register I just so happened to be > working at way back in the store. > > I being the object of his affection remembered clearly that > day. He being the pursuer did not remember one second of that > day. So, from my experience, in the scheme of life, this too > will pass. > > Now, my second grade granddaughter has had several young men > vying for her undying love and she handles it pretty well. One > little man puts a love note in her cubby still this school > year. He has no other friends and he has his challenges in > school. When she first brought this up about the notes, I told > her that she was a beautiful girl and she was probably always > going to have boys liking her. However, I told her she > probably would not feel the same way the boy did. She would > need to learn how to be kind yet not encourage as they have > feelings too. She is not into the boyfriend/girlfriend thing > at all. I also have told her that having boyfriends and being > in love is teenager stuff and it isn't appropriate at her age. > She really doesn't get bothered by the attention at all. Her > girlfriends are her top priority at this age.

Apr 5, 2012

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