On 9/25/06, T wrote: > On 7/13/06, barkha wrote: >> i need a humorous play to be enacted on the teachers day >> which must b different!! pls give some ideas!!
Did you get a response? I'm planning my sister's retirement party and need an idea for a classroom skit. Thanks
If this is where we post humourous items of an education and school based theme, then I might as well plug my own stuff.
I'm an Australian primary school teacher and for several years I've been putting a comic up on the internet about Australian primary school kids and the cemetery next door to their school. It is called School Spirit and there should be a link at the bottom.
It started as a primary school musical production I wrote and quickly evolved into a comic strip that has recently passed 300 strips. It is generally all safe for children to read as well as adults, and I have most of them printed and available in the classroom for my 3/4s to read whenever they wish. They enjoy it too.
If you're after some school based humour with recurring characters that are hopefully recognisable and likeable, then give School Spirit a look over. Hope to see some of you there.
I'm told that a list has been circulating via email for several years... it has words on it that you mark off every time you hear it during staff development... it's a great way to stay alert, have fun & maybe even pay attention!
I know this is an old post, but.... the game was called BullSh** - THAT's what you are supposed to shout (no one does, of course). Depending on where you are, you will have a different list of words. In my district, things like 'Differentiation', 'Cooperative Learning','Blooms Taxonomy', etc. Then, everytime you hear the word, you cross it off. It means you must stay alert during the faculty or PD meeting.
On 10/06/06, Carole wrote: > If someone has a list of these words, I would love to have it sent > to me. We need some fun, fun, fun at our staff development > sessions! thanks!
On 4/16/07, DSF/NJ wrote: > I know this is an old post, but.... the game was called BullSh** - > THAT's what you are supposed to shout (no one does, of course). > Depending on where you are, you will have a different list of words. > In my district, things like 'Differentiation', 'Cooperative > Learning','Blooms Taxonomy', etc. Then, everytime you hear the word, > you cross it off. It means you must stay alert during the faculty or > PD meeting. > > > Here are the words from the one I got: * synergy * strategic fit * core competencies * best practice * bottom line * revisit * expeditious * to tell you the truth (or "the truth is") * 24/7 * out of the loop * benchmark * value-added * pro-active * win-win * think outside the box * fast track * result-driven * empower (or empowerment) * knowledge-based * at the end of the day * touch base * mind-set * client-focused * paradigm * game plan * leverage
There is a funny school answering machine message that used to be online as a sound file. I can't find it now. Does anyone know where it is?
Here is the text of the message: * To lie about why your child is absent, press 1 * To make excuses for why your child did not do his work, press 2 * To complain about what we do, press 3 * To swear at staff members, press 4 * To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you, press 5 * If you want us to raise your child, press 6 * If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone, press 7 * To request another teacher for the third time this year, press 8 * To complain about bus transportation, press 9 * To complain about school lunches, press 0 * If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior, class work, homework, and that it's not the teachers' fault for your children's lack of effort . . . hang up and have a nice day!"
> Yes, I know it's fake, but it's still funny. I'm trying to > locate the audio file. If you know where I can find it, please > let me know. Thanks. > > On 8/29/06, MrFett wrote: >> that answering machine message is a fake: >> [link removed]
Every Friday our preschoolers watch a video. We usually have to turn it off to go out for our recess time. Yesterday one of my children asked (about the video) "Can we watch just one more page?"
Saw this on and participated in answering question on another board last week. Thought I'd open it up here. What are some questions you, as a teacher, would love to ask parents but can't?
1) That's a lovely nail job, Ms. Jones. Is that the reason your son didn't have money for a notebook, eraser and pencils?
2) After 10 kids, seven in special education, is condom use being considered at home? No, not condiments, that's ketchup and mustard! Condoms.
3) Was Judge Judy that interesting that you could not take five minutes to help Charles with his homework?
4) After hearing expletives, "You say you don't know where your child picks up his foul words?"
5) Is there a working clock at home?
6) To a woman collecting checks for her multiple special-ed children: "Your kids are failing. None is receiving at-home tutoring, and there isn't a computer or Leap Frog learning center in the house. But that is one heck of a nice truck you just bought. How did you swing it?"
7) How come the only time I see you is when the school of offering free door prizes or food?
ldaberryOn 2/18/10, Jennyhen wrote: > On 10/23/06, Stephen T. wrote: >> Saw this on and participated in answering question on >> another board last week. Thought I'd open it up here. What >> are some questions you, as a teacher, would love to ask >> parents but can't? >> >> 1) That's a lovely nail job, Ms. Jones. Is t...See MoreOn 2/18/10, Jennyhen wrote: > On 10/23/06, Stephen T. wrote: >> Saw this on and participated in answering question on >> another board last week. Thought I'd open it up here. What >> are some questions you, as a teacher, would love to ask >> parents but can't? >> >> 1) That's a lovely nail job, Ms. Jones. Is that the reason >> your son didn't have money for a notebook, eraser and > pencils? >> >> 2) After 10 kids, seven in special education, is condom use >> being considered at home? No, not condiments, that's ketchup >> and mustard! Condoms. >> >> 3) Was Judge Judy that interesting that you could not take >> five minutes to help Charles with his homework? >> >> 4) After hearing expletives, "You say you don't know where >> your child picks up his foul words?" >> >> 5) Is there a working clock at home? >> >> 6) To a woman collecting checks for her multiple special-ed >> children: "Your kids are failing. None is receiving at-home >> tutoring, and there isn't a computer or Leap Frog learning >> center in the house. But that is one heck of a nice truck >> you just bought. How did you swing it?" >> >> 7) How come the only time I see you is when the school of >> offering free door prizes or food? >> >> I'm sure you guys have much better. > 8) I see you're driving a new SUV. I guess having your kids > on the free breakfast/lunch program is really paying off big > time, isn't it?
My fave: Oh? You mean the school did not call you personally to tell you that mid-year and final exams occur on those dates before you booked your cruises? Well, golly-gee, I think you should sue!!!! What an inconvenience!
"If you can't come up with successful consequences and rewards at home for not completing assignments, what do you think we can do at school?" I had a parent that sent a note just this week addressedd to her son's teachers that basically said "I can't get him to do his work at home, so please feel free to keep him in at recess (our lunch time) to do it." Yet the boy still has his cell phone, TV and video time, sports, friends over, etc. I DON'T UNDERSTAND PARENTS WHO DO NOT PARENT.
On 2/18/10, Jennyhen wrote: > On 10/23/06, Stephen T. wrote: >> Saw this on and participated in answering question on >> another board last week. Thought I'd open it up here. What >> are some questions you, as a teacher, would love to ask >> parents but can't? >> >> 1) That's a lovely nail job, Ms. Jones. Is that the reason >> your son didn't have money for a notebook, eraser and > pencils? >> >> 2) After 10 kids, seven in special education, is condom use >> being considered at home? No, not condiments, that's ketchup >> and mustard! Condoms. >> >> 3) Was Judge Judy that interesting that you could not take >> five minutes to help Charles with his homework? >> >> 4) After hearing expletives, "You say you don't know where >> your child picks up his foul words?" >> >> 5) Is there a working clock at home? >> >> 6) To a woman collecting checks for her multiple special-ed >> children: "Your kids are failing. None is receiving at-home >> tutoring, and there isn't a computer or Leap Frog learning >> center in the house. But that is one heck of a nice truck >> you just bought. How did you swing it?" >> >> 7) How come the only time I see you is when the school of >> offering free door prizes or food? >> >> I'm sure you guys have much better. > 8) I see you're driving a new SUV. I guess having your kids > on the free breakfast/lunch program is really paying off big > time, isn't it?
You don't have to put your email address or name or anything, just click on the red "report this post" link inside the spam post (after you click on the subject line and open the post, you will see the red letters down on the left of the post window). That will notify the webmaster of the spam post for removal.
On 11/04/06, If we notify the site the spam posts will be removed wrote: > You don't have to put your email address or name or > anything, just click on the red "report this post" link > inside the spam post (after you click on the subject line > and open the post, you will see the red letters down on the > left of the post window). > That will notify the webmaster of the spam post for removal.
I failed as assignment on writing "standards based" objectives for not including performance objectives (POs).. because my area has none. They have "key ideas/concepts" which are exactly the same thing but labeled differently.
I found this out on my own and told my prof.. she said "you do.. find them". The grade did knock my grade a full letter grade, so I filed an appeal. I brought in about 100 pages of standards yanked from every website imaginable..no POs anywhere. My prof brought her life experience-- there had to be performance objectives or teachers couldn't teach and the assignment was for me to find them.
The committee said they "usually send the results by mail.. but in this case I think we can tell you today.. just give us about 15 minutes and come back..". My prof wasn't even gone when they all started laughing so hard they almost literally both fell out of their chairs and peed in their pants.. and 15 minutes later I won :).
Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside!
Thanksgiving Dinner on the run. A woman called 1-800-323-4848 to find out how long it would take to roast her turkey. To answer the question, the Talk-Line home economist asked how much the bird weighed. The woman responded, "I don't know, it's still running around outside."
Then there's the time a lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're all dead.
The Silver Lining to the Burning Question You Burnt the Bird? Reasons to Be Thankful! Uninvited guests will think twice next year. The smoke alarm was due for a test. After dinner, the guys can take the bird to the yard and play football. The less turkey Uncle George eats, the less likely he will be to walk around with his pants unbuttoned. You'll get to the desserts quicker.
Did you hear about the X-rated turkey? It's served with very little dressing.
On 7/13/06, barkha wrote:
> i need a humorous play to be enacted on the teachers day
> which must b different!! pls give some ideas!!